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In many ways, you yield some authority to the church. So I knew what I was getting into when I married him though I secretly hoped he would still convert back. This is not about either of you individually. There are some gems like admission to peep stone in a hat translation to the book of Mormon and angels with swords commanding polygamy, but if someone believes Joseph Smith really did stuff his face into a hat and translate scriptures about ancient jews coming to America, it means they are insane, and you can't reason with an insane person. You will join the church. Finally, the decision of whom you marry is really between you and God. I really do have strong feelings for him and want to make this work… but I'm beginning to feel like I have no identity of my own anymore and I will forever just be, "the doctor's wife. Yeah, I think we need to have that talk I've been putting off.